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Do Not Stand by My Grave and Weep

Hanoke Japanese Gardens, Saratoga, California
Hanoke Japanese Gardens, Saratoga, California

Do not stand by my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond’s glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripening grain.
I am the gentle autumn’s rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.
Mary Elizabeth Frye (1905-2004), Poem 1932

That lovely poem (often wrongly attributed to Native American origin and tradition) reads like a prayer or a hymn. This is not surprising since true prayer and true poetry both come from Sacred Space. It was recited this past Saturday as we celebrated  the inspiring life of a dear friend who left his body shortly before his seventieth birthday and his twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. He was a nature lover and we approprately celebrated his life out-of-doors at the Hanoke Japanese Gardens. Our friend died of chronic leukemia.

Throughout the fifteen years our friend lived with dying, there was nary a complaint. Even in dying he was true to his core value, thinking of – loving – others. Among his last sentiments was the hope – the encouragement – that the lessons we’d take from his life were to live with equanimity and to live hugely, kindly and consciously.

Also read at his Celebration of Life were St. Francis’ Prayer and The Buddhist Metta (Loving Kindness) Sutra (guidance), which was written in  similiar spirit as St. Francis’ Prayer.

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace;
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
And where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,
Grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console;
To be understood, as to understand;
To be loved, as to love;
For it is in giving that we receive,
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
And it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
Amen.

– St. Francis of Assisi

 

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Like many of us today, our friend combined the wisdom of several traditions to create a spiritual life that worked well for him. Raised a Catholic he took seriously the injunctions in St. Francis’ Prayer. He also valued the similar life philosophies of oneness, stewardship, non-attachment and respect for silence found in Buddhist scripture and practice and in Native American spirituality. His daily practice was Buddhist for Buddhism is indeed the master of meditative technology.

In memory of B.K.S. xo

May all sentient beings find peace.

If you are viewing this in an email, you will have to link through to the site to enjoy this beautiful and peaceful video with a Metta chant put to music. It’s sung in Pali but offers English subtitles.

And thus we begin . . .

If you are viewing this post from Facebook or email, it’s likely you will have to click through to watch the video. 

May this be the year we let go of certainty and embrace mystery.

May this be the year we know love as respect and peace as decision.

HAPPY 2016!

Love,
Jamie

Keep Smiling Bag, a little gift for trying times …

Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. His Holiness, the 14th Dalai Lama of Tibet

A lifetime ago I had a job in social work where I was privileged to work with folks who were everyday heroes in desperate circumstances. Fortunately, there were many substantive things we could do to help our clients. However, small thoughtful little gifts –  like a KEEP SMILING BAG – were also much appreciated. 

A Catholic might call this a Caritas Bag; a Buddhist, a Metta Bag; a Jew, a Chesed Bag. A Native American might call it a Medicine Bag. I just call it a KEEP SMILING BAG.  It’s a bag full of affection and support in the form of bracing little reminders.

I originally posted this piece in early 2011 but these are trying times for so many people I know. I thought I might post it again. You may have a few people in your life who could use a KEEP SMILING BAG. You might even prepare one for yourself. This is a gift that is meant to go with a prayer and loving intention.

These are the supplies you’ll need to gather:

    • A tiny cheery gift bag
    • An eraser
    • A few glass marbles
    • A fat rubberband
    • A few colored crayons
    • A birthday candle
    • Hershey’s Hugs and Kisses
    • A short stript of silk ribbon
    • A few gold stars
Gather the goodies into the bag and prepare an instruction card to go with it:
.
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
KEEP SMILING BAG

Here are a few things to get you through the days:
  1. Eraser – to erase your negative self-talk
  2. Marbles – for when you think you’ve lost yours (you haven’t)
  3. Rubber band – you can s-t-r-e-t-c-h into new activities, fresh points of view
  4. Crayons – events may color your life, but you choose the colors
  5. Silk ribbon – to tie everything together when it seems it’s all falling apart
  6. Stars – to get to the top of the mountain, you need to reach for the stars
  7. Candle – your inner light – the true you – is bigger than the circumstances of your life
  8. Hershey’s Hugs & Kisses – Someone cares. Me! 🙂

 
© 2014, Jamie Dedes, All rights reserved; Photo credits ~ Bag, Ann Cervova, Public Domain Pictures.net. Hershey’s Kisses ~ courtesy of IvoShandor under Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 Unported via Wikipedia. Flowers ~ (c) my Mother’s Day flowers, Jamie Dedes.

That uncaged inspiration … Maya Angelou

AngeloupoemTHAT UNCAGED INSPIRATION, MAYA ANGELOU, has died leaving behind the rich legacy of a well-lived eighty-six years. Her last tweet posted on May 23 was, “Listen to yourself and in that quietude you might hear the voice of God.”

I particularly appreciated her May 11 tweet, “Happy Mother’s Day to all mothers, the family and everyone you love and everyone who loves you.”

Bon voyage dear poet …

A little trivia for my San Francisco Bay Area friends: Dr. Angelou broke new ground here even as a young girl. She was SF’s first black female cable car driver.

The photo of Dr. Angelou is in the public domain

Suggested reading:

Maya Angelou celebrates 80 years of pain and joy – USA Today.com